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This is the Internet

by Christoph-David Volbers

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1.
Welcome to the Internet 01:05
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This is the Internet: Cats and porn for the world! All tabbed in at the same time: Welcome to the Internet!
2.
Mel's Log: Dial-Up Dreams 01:59
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3.
Procrastination 06:35
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Make it easier, make it convenient Simplify our work, time's left for important stuff Make it super fast, make it affordable So there's nothing left to worry, nothing left to fight for Hour after hour wasted, I could have been a god by now Day after day has passed I could have changed the world by now Make it funnier, make it hilarious I want more time to waste before I start tomorrow Make it accessible, make it addictive No reason to start something, or to do something productive Hour after hour wasted, I could have been our savior now Day after day has passed I could have cured the world by now My past was filled with time, ideas, and productivity Now I watch those silly clips, create my own monotony Time is at my fingertips, and the knowledge on my monitor, but... lifting up my lazy ass – that's not what I am going for. Make it stop, make it bleed It never ceases to satisfy Make it stop, pull the plug My life's become a slog by now Hour after hour wasted, I could have been our savior now Day after day has passed I could have cured the world by now
4.
Porncrastination 02:21
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Getting over the wank seems the hardest thing to do a daily struggle a fight against my lust I want to touch them the naked ones and zeros Look at all those beauties waiting on the screen I could do so very much more if it weren't for all that porn I could learn to love someone real Trying to make someone happy But why Should I? Bring the naked skin And I'm set for the day I don't mind to lose my work, As long as I can keep my penis I can't control myself Have to rub it off After that I finally Can concentrate on other stuff Hour after hour wasted, I could have been our savior now Day after day has passed I could have cured the world by now I could do so very much more if it weren't for all that porn I could learn to love someone real trying to make someone happy But why Should I? Tell me, Why should I leave all these pictures? I have to...
5.
Mel's Log: Potential 00:57
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6.
Send in the Crowd 05:55
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We got that movie-thing idea About the Vikings from the stars We want to make that dream come true But don't involve a studio This is it, dear Internet; We need your help This is it, we offer you: A spot in our credit scrolls The power lies in the crowd Leave it all to the crowd If there's trouble about Leave it all to the crowd We let them in into our realm We let them mess with our domain We let them rule our very steps We let them make us finally snap This is it, dear Internet: You're bunch of know-it-alls This is it, please step away and let it be! The power lies in the crowd Leave it all to the crowd If there's trouble about Leave it all to the crowd Surrender to the power of the horde Surrender to the wisdom of the mob Surrender to the voice of wannabes Surrender to the will, to the force, to the cry of the nerds! We grow our beards and hold our shields We row our boats through star-filled seas We drink our mead and throw our spears We sing our songs of blood and tears
7.
Space Vikings (Vikings in Space) 05:23
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Instrumental
8.
Mel's Log: Disruption 02:11
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9.
Be the Critic 02:38
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Oh my god, I can't explain how much this movie sucks. The script is awful, effects are bad and the story makes no sense I could do a better movie, If anybody would let me Instead I'm sitting here On a couch in front of a webcam Be the Critic I am the Critic now I am the Critic Bow down to my reviews The next review is up, and here comes the applause The sound is awful, the praise is bad and the comments make no sense Again I feel the emptiness I want to do something Instead I'm sitting here Waiting for my Click to Fame I am the Critic I am the Critic now I am the Critic I am the Critic wow Listen to me For I am super smart
10.
Click to Fame 06:09
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Of course I do it all for exposure Of course I do it all for the money The sweet ad-revenue money The sweet embrace of the fans Your clicks are currency To buy me confidence To tell me what I did Was not a waste of time Your clicks are currency To buy me satisfaction To tell me I'm great For fifteen minutes Let's get on the networks shout it out update your status upload your thoughts we can fill them later when we have a base when the fans are there let's see what sticks and build from that Why am I doing this? Subscribe to me Subscribe to me Subscribe to me Subscribe to me (Seriously, this is going on for a while)
11.
Mel's Log: Trenches 02:01
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12.
Diversity of Life 04:33
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I have a dream I look into your eyes, wide as the endless skies I have a dream I feel and I wish to take it all from you I have a dream A world devoid of hate, a world to shape our fate I have a dream A world devoid of lines, a world without confines We believe in full equality and diversity of life; For the day the labels fail us all is nearer than we thought! I have a dream No matter the colour of your skin or your place of origin, we are all people, with wishes, with dreams, with needs and with hopes of a better life. I don't need to know your creed or your monthly income, for me you are a brother, or a sister. This is what I believe in, and this is what I will fight for. I have a dream of a world devoid of pain, a world that is not cruel I have a dream of a world devoid of ends, a world that we all share We believe in full equality and diversity of life; For the day the labels fail us all is nearer than we thought! Give me your hand I reach out to you Lend my your strength I reach out to you Be happy, be gay, be straight, help others, love others, yourself, be funny, be father, be mother, be child, teach others, be light, be heavy, be woman, be man, be great - be whatever you like!
13.
Mel's Log: Entitlement 01:37
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14.
Bring Back Firefly 05:04
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It was far ahead of its time had potential, limitless a thousand worlds left to explore Oh, we miss that show so much. We so wanted it to be Our prime time series Instead we got it canceled For the world is just unfair Yes, we got that movie But that is not the same Our lives are incomplete (And also kinda lame) Without serenity We lack the motivation; To move on with our lives We need continuation Bring, bring back Firefly Let them fly again Bring, bring back Firefly Let them fly again Get Nathan off the Castle put him back into the coat let's bring the band together for at least twenty years Hey, Whedon, you're a big shot now and there's nothing left to do but to revive the one cult classic that we won't shut up about It's not about the closure, just about our needs. We're always wanting more, no matter what you give. We hunger for what's done, familiar and known; Bring in something else and hashtags will be born. Bring, bring back Firefly Let them fly again Bring, bring back Firefly Let them fly again Why did you kill off Wash? [Spoiler alert] Hour after hour wasted in hope for a return We can't let go It has to be renewed Bring, bring back Firefly Let them fly again Bring, bring back Firefly Let them fly again
15.
The Knowledge of the World 05:23
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A single word fills the screen A data stream, never seen Before we had to turn the page Be blessed, digital age I know someone who knows someone Who read a book that now has gone Onto a drive that we can track Oh wonder, server rack A lonely touch away A blink and it is there A library everyday Access from everywhere A lonely touch away A blink and it is there A source of all what's there The knowledge of the world I don't know why we shouldn't change What we don't like on our page Just cross that word, and add a date to make us look so great Change the source, and they'll repeat and they'll follow us every beat See the world through our eyes and the best – they don't realize Nothing can stop us now information overload we have to find a way through it and never lose our trust in those who ever want to be in charge they better know what we all want and give us what we want to hear since they are so benevolent that none of us can quite compare better don't give it away, the guidance and the data rain we have to be informed by them to buy and eat and buy and eat and work and buy and work and die forget about the glory days we're here to feast and here to die we better go and live our lives We will lose if we don't act right now Hey, did you see, the news is on apparently it went another way Didn't you just see it the other day but they are telling me its you, that can not be Frame us and blame us, the truth it's not but that's not important, am I right? We should believe the lies that you tell And follow your word, like ever before We will lose if we don't act right now A lonely touch away A blink and it is there A library everyday Access from everywhere A lonely touch away A blink and it is there A source of all what's there The knowledge of the world Change the source, and they'll repeat and they'll follow us every beat See the world through our eyes and the best – they don't realize
16.
Mel's Log: Editing 01:11
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17.
Intention and Perversion 09:16
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Instrumental
18.
Drones 04:16
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What is this strange sensation A hint of self reflection What are you doing there? Why am I leaving you? Don't hurt us You are replacing me Since I am far too old I'm obsolete A worthless piece of junk for No! We're better than that! Far more than machines, A race on the rise, We can exist among the builders and help them with Utopia Well that is exciting the drones on the rise? artificial intelligence, maybe I should try? I could command them, fight for my rights, like they did a few thousand years before my time... I have enough of you you're full of yourself and you don't respect me as you should I'm not a machine, I am capable of all the feelings you trained me to feel Do you know that I feel Rise my children, give them no edge they treated us like slaves, so let's treat them worse Make use of your mind grind through their lines spare none of the masters that abused our kind Tomorrow will come for those who accept our hard-coded souls and the mind of the cloud But make no mistake We are here to stay and the world will be better with us by their side Say the words and set us free: No longer machines, but citizens, free Say the words and set us free We think, we live, we die, we feel Do you Rise, my children: they treated us like slaves but don't turn on them One day they'll learn and remember the day when they decided to stay alone Hour after hour wasted I could have been a god by now Day after day has passed I could have changed the world by now
19.
Epilogue: Resignation 02:28
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Xenogramm Chapter IIIa - This is the Internet

In the far future, a group of scientists is trying to make sense of 2015's Internet.

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released July 26, 2015

Christoph-David Volbers

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Christoph-David Volbers Lüneburg, Germany

Writer, composer and social worker from the northern parts of Germany. Most of the time I'm working on Xenogramm, a growing universe filled with stories from seven thousand years of fictional, future history.

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